How to Get Wax Out of your Ear.

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Everyone knows that bloggers often cover the most mundane subjects. And the Internet was created to share information. That here you are likely to find something a little eclectic. So why not something practical? This is certainly not the most distasteful thing I have ever written about. But possibly one that could do the greatest good.

About two weeks ago, after my bath, the water wasn’t draining completely out of my right ear. I let it go for a few days hoping something would happen. I used my ample box of Q-tips brand swabs (one of the things that separates me from the homeless,) but to no avail.

So a few more days into it I began to get a sense of pressure in that ear and some hearing loss. Now I have put up with many annoying and un-comfortable things for sometime. It’s part of my mining camp heritage, but after a while I began to worry.

Afterall this is my Head. Probably my single most prized possession. I couldn’t do anything without it. I don’t want to F*** it up and I’m no brain surgeon (literally.) So What can I do?

I check the Internet of course. Nothing definitive but some ideas. Of course the site that sells ear candles wants you to use ear candles. But then I recall an huge thread on the Element11 user group about ear candles – pros and cons – and in general always thought that they were a wee bit of a stretch. Maybe not for the early Celts, but for me.

And the idea of sticking a candle in my ear and lighting it seems in-elegant if not plain weird. So it’s time to dig deeper. Figuratively.

I start to network. All the time my head is in a half-inflated state. Who knows?. Common-law wives of best friends or the girl who works the morning shift at the Sev. It is amazing how you can solve problems with a little subtle self-disclosure, an open mind, a good attitude and a strong sense of detachment – I always could go to the doctor.

The pharmacist at Harmon’s points blankly to the shelf by the eye drops. There is a bunch of stuff there but I’m not really sure what the problem is. And look at these prices. $17 bucks for a .10c Chinese bulb and hydrogen peroxide. Hell I’m not made of money. I’m made of wax.

The Net said Hydrogen Peroxide will work better and is cheaper – I mean pennies on the dollar. I so I cop a 12 oz bottle for like .69c. Peroxide atracts water, now I just need the applicator.

Some people have used a Waterpik, with very damaging results. But finding an old enema squirter is hard these days. Even at Walgreens’ and I didn’t want to go all the way over to the Blue Boutique. In hind site I should have gotten a turkey baster – now they have 3 uses. But I did find eye droppers for a buck.

This is after I had already made a doctor’s appointment. I put some hydrogen peroxide in my ear . . . bubble , bubble . . it’s like there’s a party in my head and everyone’s coming. Still no luck. A little better but still the same.

Days go by. I space out my doctor’s appt. I make another but I’m still in a plugged up haze. I can’t hear much at all. I keep having to turn the music up. When all else fails try again.

The key is to put alot of Hydrogen Peroxide in your ear leave it there for some time —10 to 20 minutes or more. Rinse and repeat. But mainly use a dropper, baster or bulb to flush the drum. Flush vigorously (I am not a doctor) It’s messy. But guess what?

Pop . . . It worked. In goes a Q-tip, which comes out pretty much covered in a burnt umber grease. My whole drum was sealed. My ear felt better. I could hear! Twelve hours later my head was back to normal.

I survived and on the cheap. And you can too. Even if you are living in a Van down by the river. Self reliance is music to my ears.

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